Tuesday, September 30, 2008


Girl I can't notice but to
Think of you (you)
Governing me (me)
From across the room I can see it
And can't stop myself from shaking and
Thinking of you
Governing me
Watch out I've seen her type before
That girl is so dangerous
That girl is so dangerous
That girl is a bad girl
I've seen her type before
She's so dangerous
That girl is so dangerous
That girl is a bad girl, yeah

Ohhh yeah thats her
The big dog tryin to get her little kitty to purr.
Ex-man lookin at me like I'm Lucifer,
Cause he knows I will be on the case
Yes sir!
If I was the last man on earth
I would only blame that girl
End of search
She give a new definition to the word curve
Got chicks in the strip club envyin her
Body's like a weapon of mass erruptions,
See the glad on that phat obstruction,
Tongue game give a new type of seduction.
(Im trying to give that girl something... CHA!)

Girl I can't notice but to
Think of you (you)
Governing me (me)
From across the room I can see it
And can't stop myself from shaking and
Thinking of you
Governing me
Watch out I've seen her type before
That girl is so dangerous
That girl is so dangerous
That girl is a bad girl
I've seen her type before
She's so dangerous
That girl is so dangerous
That girl is a bad girl, yeah

Ohh...Bad to the bone,
Everything locked like a two-three zone
I wanted to make my black snake moan
Talk a lick a bit and take that home
She bad and she know the deal
That sweater can’t hide what she want to conceal
I mean Megan Good and Halle Berry
Put together ain't close to the JUBEE i see (no no)
No disrespect but this gyal a pon another level
Cut the check..uhhh
Tell the king,
Man stop the press
Say kid can I get a witness

Girl I can't notice but to
Think of you (you)
Governing me (me)
From across the room I can see it
And can't stop myself from shaking and
Thinking of you
Governing me
Watch out I've seen her type before
That girl is so dangerous
That girl is so dangerous
That girl is a bad girl
I've seen her type before
She's so dangerous
That girl is so dangerous
That girl is a bad girl, yeah

I see you got that fire
By the way that you walkin' (walkin')
from left to right
i watched her go down
Girl I just want it right now
Don't wanna do no talkin' [talkin']
Shorty's so right I need to slow down

Figure 8
Good body shape
When she on the dance floor
Gyal dem irate
When she do her thing
A man can’t walk straight
That biscuit can soak up everyting on my plate
Bad heels like Jessica B
I'm tryna give homegirl sex and the cit-it-it-ty
Itty bitty waistline moves with the baseline
One lick of punch.. I’m fine

Girl I can't notice but to
Think of you (you)
Governing me (me)
From across the room I can see it
And can't stop myself from shaking and
Thinking of you
Governing me
Watch out I've seen her type before
That girl is so dangerous
That girl is so dangerous
That girl is a bad girl
I've seen her type before
She's so dangerous
That girl is so dangerous
That girl is a bad girl, yeah

Sunday, September 28, 2008

Undecideds in Polling

In the past, the undecided voters heading into the election are generally split 50/50, 60/40 or some other number close to half barring some sort of very effective advertisement or tremendous gaffe.

This year, however, I think we have to assume when we look at general tracking numbers that the undecided voters are going to be split more extreme - something like 70/30 or 80/20 in favor of John McCain. The reason for this is, I believe, because one of the reasons that these undecided voters are "undecided" is because they generally want to vote for John McCain, but he is too terrible a candidate for them to make the commitment. While they claim they are weighing their options, they are probably not. Instead, they are simply embarrassed that they'd rather vote for McCain and are waiting for a good excuse. If they do not "make up their mind" before the election (probably related to whether or not McCain becomes a popular choice again) they will still likely vote for him on election day.

Why do I believe they will not vote for Obama?

For starters, Obama's strength is his ability to inspire pride in your beliefs. There is not a single voter that is "reluctantly" voting for Obama, not including previous Hillary Clinton supporters. Secondly, McCain is and has been an awful candidate thus far. So voters that are undecided are likely not committed to Obama because:

- They really believe that experience is somehow a big issue
- They are socially conservative
- They are gullible and believe propaganda
- They do not want to vote for a black man (not something I believe, but possible)

All of those are not terribly likely to change come election day, but they can change. If election day comes and they have not, however, McCain is going to be their likely choice, since his only flaw is that he sucks.

has shown some great polling lately for Obama, including a 4% lead in the popular vote. But there are still 6-8% undecided voters, and in this case I think Obama needs to try to win 1 or 2% more undecideds at least before election day, because if they do not make up their mind they'll probably vote for McCain.

Friday, September 26, 2008

Zero -

That is how many times John McCain looked at Obama during the entire debate. Even after being instructed to look directly at Obama, he did not glance over, nor did he ever engage in discussion.

A man that cannot look at his opponent is not presidential. He's a coward. The only reason not to look is because you're frightened. You're either frightened or racist, and since I'm not going to assume the latter, the only choice is the former. He wants to say he isn't afraid, but the old man wouldn't look at him once. Even when they shook hands at the end of the debate, McCain looked away. That's pathetic.

Open Debate Thread

I don't want to make numerous posts, so I'll leave my thoughts as comments.

Thursday, September 25, 2008

Bailout Talks Shut Down

Recently I haven't been needed. The Republicans are doing it for me.

“We’re in a serious economic crisis,” Mr. Bush told reporters as the meeting began shortly before 4 p.m. in the Cabinet Room, adding, “My hope is we can reach an agreement very shortly.”

But once the doors closed, the smooth-talking House Republican leader, John A. Boehner of Ohio, surprised many in the room by declaring that his caucus could not support the plan to allow the government to buy distressed mortgage assets from ailing financial companies.

Mr. Boehner pressed an alternative that involved a smaller role for the government, and Mr. McCain, whose support of the deal is critical if fellow Republicans are to sign on, declined to take a stand.

And there we are. I don't care about the bailout. But rest assured that everything bad that happens from now on is the fault of the Republicans.

In the Roosevelt Room after the session, the Treasury secretary, Henry M. Paulson Jr. literally bent down on one knee as he pleaded with Nancy Pelosi, the House Speaker, not to “blow it up” by withdrawing her party’s support for the package over what Ms. Pelosi derided as a Republican betrayal.

“I didn’t know you were Catholic,” Ms. Pelosi said, a wry reference to Mr. Paulson’s kneeling, according to someone who observed the exchange. She went on: “It’s not me blowing this up, it’s the Republicans.”

Mr. Paulson sighed. “I know. I know.”

Paulson knows. Pelosi knows. Democrats know. Even Bush knows, and Bush doesn't know anything. The Republicans are ruining this country.


and Mr. McCain...declined to take a stand.

No shit.

Wednesday, September 24, 2008

Political Ploys

John McCain (canceling the debates):

“I am calling on the President to convene a meeting with the leadership from both houses of Congress, including Senator Obama and myself. It is time for both parties to come together to solve this problem.”

Barack Obama:

“This is exactly the time when people need to hear from the candidates. Part of the president’s job is to deal with more than one thing at once. In my mind it’s more important than ever.”

McCain needs more time to deal with the problem that he himself created. Meanwhile, Barack Obama can multitask. Which of these two people appears more qualified to be president?

Monday, September 22, 2008

The Point has Been Said Before. The Point Should Be Said Again.

This should be a bigger deal. This is essentially the mantra of the Republican Party - helping people is not important. C.R.E.A.M.

It's a sad world when the people that are most viciously mocked are the people trying to make life better for those mocking them.

Via JohnBai

Saturday, September 20, 2008

Seattle Times Recommends Barack Obama for President

Now, I know what you're thinking. Conservative Seattle voting for Barack Obama? What?!

But before the sarcasm meter erupts, the Seattle Times itself is not necessarily a liberal magazine, though obviously its readers lean that way. Hopefully the Seattle Times is the first of many to follow suit.


Wednesday, September 17, 2008

The Fundementals of Our Economy Are Strong

So, so true. Using that same logic, here are a number of other things that are true:

- Fox News is fair and balanced.
- The Bridge to Nowhere goes somewhere.
- The Muppets are based on the characters from Casablanca.
- MySpace is user friendly.
- The most effective way to get over depression is to cut yourself.
- Mosquito bites are love bumps by Jesus.
- Sarah Palin is qualified to be President.

That one line may have singlehandedly lost him over 200,000 votes or more from people who now realize he's an idiot.


One more quick thought on the Palin pick:

One of the things picking Sarah Palin did was it brought John McCain back into the spotlight. Before the conventions, Barack Obama was on every channel and John McCain was barely mentioned. This brought a lot of complaints by the McCain campaign about unfair coverage.

But it was that unfair coverage that allowed John McCain to get away with the numerous mistakes he was making throughout his campaign. His geography mistakes, his accidentally saying he wants to bomb Iran and Russia before getting corrected by Lieberman, the blatantly incorrect statements about the economy, foreign policy, and his own voiced political beliefs...

But with Palin, John McCain has thrown himself back on stage. This may make the McCain campaign happy, but it shouldn't, because now his mistakes are finally being reported on as well, and his complete incompetence is finally a news story.

In other words, there is a chance that his new popularity is what loses him the election. He may have had a better chance if he had simply stayed in the shadows, feeding on children's dreams or whatever else he does.

Monday, September 15, 2008

Sunday, September 14, 2008

Palin - A Failed Heartbeat Away from the Presidency

This woman could not be more unqualified if she were Bush's wart. Which she is. She's essentially Bush, 20 years younger and on estrogen. Her entire "cabinet" (that includes when she was a mayor) are her own personal friends with no qualifications other than they are her friends. She fires people that disagree with her. She is, without a doubt, the worst pick for a Vice President in terms of someone that "Should" be at that high a position in the government.

And yet she is helping McCain win, because the country is intent on being impressed that someone is as stupid as they are. The President you can have a beer with, the Vice President you would buy a beer for, and the White House full of people as dumb as the rest of America. This is what Americans aspire to, and if you wonder why so many people insist on claiming they plan to run away to Canada, it is because it they do not want to be surrounded by people that somehow consider "average intelligence" a qualification for the highest position in the world.

Friday, September 12, 2008

McCain Blind on The View

John McCain was grilled by the women on The View while he tried really hard to suck up to Hillary Clinton supporters. Grilled. But both my favorite and my least favorite issue was when McCain claimed that Palin supported 0 earmarks while she was a governor. She supported 52, for almost 200 million dollars.

And I'm upset, because people are going to continue to believe it. People are going to believe when the Republicans simply lie. These are not stretches of the truth. These are lies.

Monday, September 8, 2008

Time for the beginning of the end for America

Shut. Up.

LEE'S SUMMIT, Mo. (AP) -- John McCain and Sarah Palin criticized Democrat Barack Obama over the amount of money he has requested for his home state of Illinois, even though Alaska under Palin's leadership has asked Washington for 10 times more money per citizen for pet projects.

Republicans are the worst people in the entire world.

Off Topic - What Are Dog Years?

I'm fairly positive that the entire population of the world has "dog years" wrong. People often refer to a dog's age in terms of "Dog years," like in the sentence:

"My dog is 5 in dog years, which is about 40 in human years."

Wikipedia, every dog site in the world - they all refer to the age of the dog in this manner. But this just wrong. 5 years may be equivalent to 40 human years, but the 5 years that passed are still 5 human years.

So if someone says "My dog is 7 in dog years." My response is "Ah, so hasn't he been alive for 7 human years?" And the answer is "yes."

The dog is 5 in human years. 5 human years is the equivalent, to a dog, as 40 (or 35 or 45 depending on the weight of your dog). So it should be 40 dog years. The time is measured in human years, and so it should be referred to in human years. When 7 human years pass, whatever the equivalent is should be called "Dog years" because that is the rate to which the dog aged. I am not 40 years older when 7 "dog years" pass, because it was 7 human years that passed, not dog years.

Wow that bugs me.

(note: the embedded chart is the only one that I saw that had it right)

Sunday, September 7, 2008

They Can Literally Do Nothing Right.

To review some of the more well known apolitical errors at the RNC:

1) Somehow John McCain ended up being in front of yet another green screen.
2) The Republicans, after (yet again) failing to do their research, had an image of Walter Reed High School in California behind McCain as he spoke, when they meant to put Walter Reed Medical Center, which is strange in its own right, considering the tremendous failures of Bush and McCain with the Medical Center itself.
3) The teleprompter was clearly a Democrat.

And now, to add onto the failures of the McCain administration (get it?), the Republicans used a song by the Seattle based rock group "Heart" called "Barracuda" to introduce Palin twice, first on the day she spoke and then when she walked in to meet up with McCain.

The band is made up of avid liberals, and the song itself was meant as a statement against corporate corruption, something they believe both McCain and Palin are a part of. The Republicans failed to ask Heart if they could use their music, and the entire Republican party has now been told that they, under no circumstances, are allowed to play the song again.



Also, for fun, an official statement from the band:

"Sarah Palin's views and values in NO WAY represent us as American women. We ask that our song 'Barracuda' no longer be used to promote her image. The song 'Barracuda' was written in the late '70s as a scathing rant against the soulless, corporate nature of the music business, particularly for women. (The 'barracuda' represented the business.) While Heart did not and would not authorize the use of their song at the RNC, there's irony in Republican strategists' choice to make use of it there."

Saturday, September 6, 2008

Some Points and Poorly Worded Quickly Typed Rant

- In McCain's speech, he used the phrase "They Broke Me." That was him saying that the torture was so bad that he gave away government secrets. Now, I don't blame him for that - torture is a terrible thing. So then why does he support it?
- Throughout all of the Republican speeches, none of them were about what they plan on doing with the country. All of them, somehow, were still about John McCain representing change. None of them explained why.
- Sarah Palin has now said twice as an example of how she is against pork barrel spending that she did not want money for the "Bridge to Nowhere." Sarah Palin not only asked for money for the bridge, she also begged for the money, got the money, started plans on building the bridge and when the funding became a national embarrassment led by none other than John McCain, she cancelled the bridge but did not give any of the money back. I can't believe this isn't a bigger deal.
- Mitt Romney called both the executive and the judicial branch of the government "liberal." This man is a tremendous idiot.
- "HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHHHA Community Organizers? What a fucking joke! Fuck you, people that want to make the world a better place."
- Flip flopping worked on John Kerry because some people are really really stupid. John McCain has "flip flopped" more, all of them are documented on video, all of them are about very serious Republican issues (tax cutting, abortion, religious conservatism) and John McCain is not going to lose any votes. Think about that for a second: Stupid people did not vote for the Democrat because he may have changed his mind. Stupid people are still voting for McCain even though he did to. Nothing about that reflects well on the Republican party.
- "It's close to Russia" may be the absolute stupidest qualification in the history of American politics.

At this point I think something needs emphasizing. If Obama loses this election, it will have absolutely nothing to do with him being black. Zero. There were all of these stupid quotes from pundits that said "They may say they support Obama, but as soon as they get to the voting booths, when they have to choose a black president, many of them will not be able to mark the bubble."

Bullshit. It will have nothing to do with it. If Obama loses, it is because a signficantly large portion of America is unintelligent.

Had Obama not been winning until now I could not say that with as much confidence as I can now. But he was winning going into the convention, and the convention was a non-stop barrage of false information. The current government is a liberal government? Sarah Palin did not support the bridge? Barack Obama attacked Palin's family?

All of those speeches were interesting. They were not badly performed. But they were complete falsities. Some of them (Palin's bridge, again, as an example) were not just misguided but literally just lies. They are simply things that were not true in the slightest - in fact, they were the opposite of things that really did happen.

To those that were swayed by thes speeches, I want to put what the Republicans did into a perspective that you may understand:

Say your mother bought a brand new puppy as a surprise birthday gift. You have always wanted a dog, and your mom thought this puppy would be the one thing to make you truly happy. This puppy would be very important to you. Your mom asks the Republicans to watch it until you get back from your vacation. While you are gone the Republicans brutally anal rape your puppy and then roast it on an open flame. You come home and there is black ash on the lips of the Republicans and a fork in their hands. There is video evidence and paper documents explaining the entire event, as well as news stories about it happening. There are even adoption papers for the puppy available, as well as photos of your mom buying it for you and her holding a sign that says "this is your present."

But before you even find out the puppy exists, the Republicans say "Hi. Welcome back to your empty home. Just so you know, if you ever got a puppy, we would never anally rape it or eat it like the Democrats would." And you have believed them, because you took their word for it and never bothered to check that the proof is right in front of your face. Sarah Palin literally brought up a bridge that no one knew about as an example of something she did when in reality she did the exact opposite. She mentioned it first with the hopes that you are too stupid to look up the documented evidence to the complete contrary. And Republican politicians did similar things the entire convention.

For those that were impressed by the Republican convention: These people are purposely talking down to you, assuming you are too stupid to look up the truth for yourself. Don't let them.

Part of Biden's Response

Finding the full clip is more difficult, but this man knows what he's doing.

Thursday, September 4, 2008

Time to Reminisce

Okay - Romney, Giuliani and Palin crossed so many lines I'm surprised their legs aren't tired. If I'm still pissed in the morning, I'll write something about it. For now, I was recently looking back through my old work and I found these old things I wrote when I used to try to be funny. Enjoy:

Fake News

Gripes List

By the way, good fucking idea ranking on community organizers. That will win you a lot of votes.

Wednesday, September 3, 2008

If the Election Ended Today

All conventions lead to bumps in polling data as people wowed by the speeches move from "undecided" to "decided." Those bumps tend to not be permanent, especially because after both conventions are over the two bumps tend to cancel each other out.

But in this case we are seeing some interesting signs - the country, for all its glory, has been far less stupid this year. Take the Palin pick - it does not matter if you like her or not. She very clearly was chosen because she is a woman. Is she qualified? Will she do a good job? That answer has a lot to do with your opinion of her and the parties (no and no). But the country has been far less predictable in how it welcomes her - they are looking at it critically, and although a large number of them are still making the wrong decision, at the very least it is a decision, not the blind following of leadership.

That brings hope. But that is just one issue. We will still have to see whether or not the speeches of the last few nights (as well as tonight and tomorrow) continue that trend. Yesterday we were treated to Joe Lieberman's awful, awful speech, where he was essentially saying nothing but praises about McCain's manhood:

"John McCain is all man. John McCain is made of penis. He bleeds testosterone and shoots bullets from his fingers."

Right after we were treated to Law and Order's Fred Thompson strange speech where he talked about McCain screwing a stripper and then went on for about 15 minutes on gore porn, where he discussed nothing but violence:

"John McCain was legally dead for 15 days. During that time he was sexually assaulted by rabid albino monkeys, some of whom weighed over 15,000 tons. Afterwards, John McCain woke up and subsequently knocked all of them unconscious with nothing but his big toe and a frito chip. Now, I'm not saying that's what makes this man qualified to be President. I'm saying that this man is qualified to be President because of everything I said."

The entire thing was a joke. Thompson's speech, despite its... um... eccentricities... was fine, because it was about McCain's character, which is the only platform he is really running on. But Lieberman's was hilariously awful. A true testament to a guy that doesn't know what he is doing. Here is where we see two speeches that people may still have "liked" in the end, but we have yet to see if they were taken at face value or if they were critically analyzed before people come to the wrong decision.

Today, we already have experience Bob Dole's interview on MSNBC where he was like "This is so exciting, what a great pick. I can't talk about her though because I don't know anything about her and have never met her, but she is definitely qualified..." Are people critically thinking about this? Or are they blindly following the propaganda?

My thought will be that even if these speeches work, if they are being thought about critically the "convention bump" would take place over a few days rather than right away, as people try to figure out whether or not they are going to agree with what was said. If immediately after Sarah Palin's speech the public thinks she was a great pick, then nothing has changed.

Tuesday, September 2, 2008

Watching the Republican Convention

Smaller arena, less enthusiasm. Still, it is interesting to see what the other side has to say.

While I am admittedly bias, when I hear these officials, politicians and delegates speak, I can't help but feel unimpressed. I'm not talking about the main speakers (there really haven't been any since I started watching) I am talking about the interviews. The "hope" in their voice seems fake and disingenuous. They say things about how Sarah Palin "is qualified" because "John McCain chose her" which is obviously bullshit, and they express that somehow McCain represents all of the Republican values that he has tried to distance himself from.

John McCain is not an exciting candidate, and while I cannot blame Republicans for trying to make him sound like an exciting candidate, I can't help but feel that it is obscenely obvious that they are lying. Few of them know how to say Palin's last name, many of them admit to not knowing anything about her, yet say that this pick makes perfect sense and was done for the good of the country, not out of a hasty political decision.

While it is unlikely that their interviews are going to affect the election at all, I can't help but feel as though they are going to struggle to experience any gains simply because it is implicitly obvious - if not explicitly so - that they are making statements they don't believe in the hopes they will win the election.

Monday, September 1, 2008

Sarah Palin's Drama

It has only been... What... 3 days since the announcement that Governor Sarah Palin was going to be the Republican running mate and it already looks like that decision is going to lead to the end of the McCain chance at a Presidency.
I had written previously that I was worried that Sarah Palin would affect the election - not necessarily by gaining votes, but rather convincing social conservative women that they definitely need to vote this year.

Luckily, that worry seems all but gone and if it were not for the hurricane, I would assume that it would be a complete wash by the Obama camp. In the last 72 hours, we have learned:

- John McCain in his "long search for a VP" never even bothered to check the local newspapers about Palin, as a Newspaper researcher went to Alaska and was told he was the first person to search the archives (Alaska's local papers are not online). So his "long search" was really a "hasty decision." And it is costing him.
- Sarah Palin was a member of an independence party that wants Alaska to Secede from the union that she is expected to lead. Yeah.
- Sarah Palin's unwed 17 year old daughter is pregnant, even though she is against sex education. She is "Choosing" to keep it even though she is not "pro-choice." The birth will take place when Palin would be sworn in.
- There is this awesomeness:

In her nationally televised speech accepting the job as John McCain's running mate, Alaska Gov. Sarah Palin said she "championed reform to end the abuses of earmark spending by Congress" and opposed federal funding for a controversial bridge to a sparsely populated island.

"I told Congress, 'Thanks, but no thanks,' on that bridge to nowhere," Palin said Friday in Ohio, using the critics' dismissive name of the project. "'If our state wanted a bridge,' I said, 'we'd build it ourselves.'"

While running for governor in 2006, though, Palin backed federal funding for the infamous bridge, which McCain helped make a symbol of pork barrel excess.

- Troopergate. Maybe a stupid word, but it's still a big deal. Don't believe me? She just hired a lawyer for the case. Snap.

- Thankfully the hurricane passed without much damage. However, all of this information was released TODAY with the intentions of it being overshadowed by the hurricane. While we could discuss how vile it is to use a hurricane to hide news, instead all the attention is still front page of the paper, because the hurricane did not do enough damage to take over as the sole major story.

One thing needs to be remembered here. No one is blaming Sarah Palin for this. Yes, many of these things are her own fault and attest to her character, but as governor of Alaska they were much less important. Here, the blame is on McCain, for not doing his research and allowing all of these personal things to be made public because he was trying to take advantage of women voters by choosing a woman to be on the ballot with him.

You brought this on yourself old man.

Gov Sarah Palin's 17 Year Old Daughter Pregnant....

...is not news. Palin is not qualified to be Vice President because she is not qualified - not because her daughter is pregnant.

The only way - and I repeat, the ONLY way this is news is if she continues to explain that abstinence only education works, and even then it should not be thrown into her face on the blogs and on the newspaper sites. Rather, it should serve as a silent reminder why she is not going to be a good president.

Update: I have changed my mind slightly. There is something that is news about this, and that is that the daughter and family have talked about how she has made the "Decision" to keep the baby. You cannot make a decision unless it is a choice. Think about it the next time you speak, governor.