Bush Meets with Shiite Leader - Meeting Described as "Constipated"

President Bush, on what may be his first attempt at feigning diplomacy, met with a prominent Iraqi Shiite Leader today, Minister Abdul Aziz al-Hakim, or, as his friends refer to him, "The Dude." The meeting represented... well, a meeting. It was certainly a meeting. Bush's agenda was to reach out to a broader range of Iraqis in order to help heal the fragile, fledging government. Hakim, for his part, denounced any attempts at an international intervention to help his country. Thankfully, though, he may accept the help of Iran, so the meeting was a collossal success.