Finally - A Post Not About Iraq

This blog has only been about Iraq recently, but that is unintentional because I care about politics in general, not simply the failed administration. Because of this, I'm going to post a lot of gripes below:

1. John McCain - I don't appreciate Senators who sell their soul to idealistic fascists only to get a nod from Evangelical leaders. You were once considered the "Maverick Moderate" and now, you're more of a political prostitute. I also want to reiterate that I still would not have voted for you because you are a Republican. There is no such thing as voting "for the candidate." It's impossible, because with a two party system the candidate is almost meaningless. Bush may be the worst president ever, but it's his conservative and Republican policies that screwed up the country, not the stupid smirk he has when he is giving a speech on the problems in Iraq. So no, even if he were still Moderate, I don't vote for people who believe cutting taxes is how you save a failing economy.
   
2. Ralph Nader - Your whole platform is "I'm not a Republican or a Democrat." Almost anyone who voted for you in 2000 only voted for you not because you are a good candidate but because they don't like the Democrats and the Republicans because the represent the evil government. Sorry, but you haven't shown me he can do anything other than complain. Plus, your face looks funny. If your face is posted on the dollar, it would lose even more value.
3. Spokane, Washington - Dude, you're not important, stop making people believe Washington is a swing state just because you believe you should be making more money from your potato business. King County is the only reason this state is prosperous, Seattle has one of the most educated populations in the world, perhaps we may know more about politics than you.
4. California - I'm serious, you voted for Arnold Schwarzenegger again? I don't know what to say.
   
5. Wyoming - I don't think you deserve two senators. You can have a congressional Page at best. I heard Foley is gone so you have less to worry about.
   
6. People Who Clap After Movies - That's not political it just really pisses me off.
7. John Kerry - SHUUUUUUUUT UUUUUUP. I used to like you, but now you need to stop talking.
   
8. Elizabeth Dole - You ever experience that burning sensation in your anus after you had too much spicy foods the night before? I feel that every time I see you talking. Stop ruining life for the people who still have time left to live.
9. Messianic Jews/Jews for Jesus - .......Sorry, no. Just no. My "Catholics for Vishnu" friend agrees.
   
10. Sean Hannity - You'd be surprised how poor an argument tactic it is to start laughing like an idiot every time you don't know how to respond to an actual statement of substance from a Democrat. It would be demeaning, except that would imply you have some sort of value that, sadly, you don't have. Every morning when I take my dog for a walk, I think I pick you up with a plastic bag and stick you in the trash can next to the bus stop. But no, it can't be you, the contents of the bag hold more weight.
11. Neil Cavuto - 'nuff said.
    
12. Bill O'Reilly - Contrary to popular (aka your) belief, you don't matter.
    
13. Jack Abramoff - You know, almost 89% of the Jewish people are liberal. Thanks for reminding us why.
    

The list goes on...